Retreat

            In Scott Hass' book Back of the House: The Secret Life of a Restaurant he recounts his time spent with Chef Tony Maws and his crew at Craigie on Main, delving into the dynamic intermingling of personalities that inevitably arises within the unique environment of a restaurant. Hass focuses upon specific character traits that allow for Chef Maws to manage the disparate personalities within his employ, but inevitably the author relates the narrative of a familial institution with the Chef established in a patriarchal role. The book becomes a story of many personal struggles, with each individual attempting to survive and flourish within the unique environment of the restaurant, while reconciling their own desire to enter into the world of professional cookery with the realities of that decision.

            Within Hass' recounting of the dynamics of the Craigie family one can find similarities within all restaurants, as these kinds of social relationships inevitably emerge in these work environments. The cook enters into the kitchen, willing to sacrifice a part of his or her identity to become a member of a team. The individual self becomes influenced by the restaurant self, which is defined by one's role within the operation and inevitably becomes associated with the familial architecture that defines the institution. As the cook sacrifices the time that could be spent engaging in relationships with family and friends outside of work, he or she replaces these relationships with those that exist behind swinging doors and mimic the structure of those bonds that they have foregone. The problem with the emergence of this collision between personal and professional relations within the restaurant space is often the absence of balance. The cook sacrifices too much in pursuit of his or her professional goals, ignoring those relationships with family and friends that have sustained him or her prior to the commitment to a kitchen. The individual self is often sacrificed in its entirety to the professional self, as one invests too greatly in the perceived familial structure that restaurants construct.

            Within my own inherited family, we recently embarked upon the companies annual retreat to our owner's farm just north of the Catskills. The retreat is a great sigh of relief following the hardships of an erratic Summer, and a deep breath before the plunge into a decidedly busy holiday season. Pig, whiskey and wood smoke abound in this communal moment defined by a spirit of conviviality. But it is also an intersection of identities, with this display of the individual self in the context of one's restaurant family. We revert to our defined roles, with cooks cleaning the kitchen, building the fires, and preparing the food, while the FOH busies themselves with preparing the dining space, handing out beers, and ensuring that each attendee is enjoying themselves to the fullest. It is a conscious acceptance of duties, confirming the strength of the architecture to which we have submitted in pursuit of a goal that is greater than any of our individual aspirations; however, it becomes something else considering the presence of the individual self of the employee within the context of the restaurant family. Plaid and boots have replaced our whites and clogs, but our roles remain fixed while in the presence of our unrestricted personalities.

 

            Upon our return to a more familiar setting we bring with us a heightened awareness of our compatriots, a more nuanced discernment for the personalities that comprise the restaurant family. Waking to find a handwritten accounting of the past night's events tucked within the tents and sleeping bags of those encircling a dying fire, while witnessing the spectacle of a crew emerging from an impromptu, drunken cheese bombardment will often promote such an appreciation for character. With this, those defining facets of our identities are masked to a lesser extent by the uniformity of our attire, the costume of our craft, while our appreciation for the opportunity that our roles present is similarly more evident. This retreat not only provides perspective, but seemingly effects the balance of our selves. Great kitchens are often comprised of an assemblage of well greased and assembled cogs, but for the sake of those employed within these machines we must find cohesion between our association with a restaurant and our individual self. A great employer will never require the submission of our identities for the sake of the product, as food without the encroachment of personality will never please the customer so much as the chill residing upon a sterile plate that is above technical reproach. Bearing a heightened awareness of this collision, I seek to embrace my identity within the context of my commitment to a restaurant and those within its employ, in an attempt to balance the personal and professional self and my dedication to these families, both real and imagined. Line Cook For Life.  

Ian